Dating someone after a long term relationship
Amanda has counselled hundreds of individuals and couples, and, as a lecturer in psychosexual therapy and sexual health counselling at Sydney University, is an expert in the field.Here, Amanda gives some stellar advice to help new singles build their confidence and emotional health after a long-term relationship breakup, and navigate the new dating rules. Anyone who’s recently broken up from a long-term relationship knows how emotionally scary facing a new life – sans your ex – can be.you have to come to terms with your new life as a single person.To add even more confusion, you may not be sure what you’re looking for in a partner, or if you’re even ready for a new relationship. Sydney Sex and Relationships Therapist Amanda Joy Robb knows a lot about sex, dating and relationships.Dating isn’t necessarily all about going out to a pub on a Friday night anymore.With the accessibility of online dating, people are quite happy to meet up during the week for a coffee. Amanda says coming out of a long-term relationship can often mean we need to look at how we want to represent ourselves.“It’s common for people to feel nervous,” she explains.“When you’ve gone from being ‘two’ to ‘one’ and you haven’t been alone for a very long time, it’s difficult to reformulate that sense of self and do things on your own – or with a stranger. ” Amanda says there’s also a bit of grief that comes with getting back on the dating cycle as well.
“So if finding a partner is a serious thing that you are after, invest the time, finances and emotions.So rather than thinking about how to tell someone your life story, ask yourself if they really need to know this information.Thinking this way can be more empowering and validating of where you are in your life.“It’s normal to feel grief that you’re in a different life stage,” she says.“I encourage anyone that is feeling this way to get themselves into an emotionally healthy and empowered space first.